Joy?

How are you doing? This world is a little strange these days and I am still trying to work out which way is up. But then i guess there’s plenty of time to work it out. The basic rule is to watch the bubbles. They always rise to the surface. So that’s my plan such as it is. Take stock, find what gives me joy, focus on that, repeat for my loved ones. Easy….right????

So, i wrote that paragraph yesterday morning. So far so peachy. But life isn’t like instagram folks. Sorry. I have fissures of failure and crevices of crises running through me. Yesterday some of them opened a little more. Like cracks on my hands from all that washing. And,sigh, washing up.

I was going to go on and be perky by suggesting i start a joy list but today i will not be so presumptuous. Today i will lie here in bed as my fingers react to the Parkinson’s drugs and slowly come to life, allowing me to type this post. I will listen to the boys being instructed in how to make me toast and jam for my Mother’s Day breakfast. And i will be happy for that. And that’s it. No grandiose perfect lifestyle statements today. No too high standards. Just small steps for today. And that’s the hardest thing for me. Reality hasn’t always served me well. Sitting with it a while is today’s challenge.

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