A day of mixed emotions here. I hope your day was clearer. On the one hand I have had a mentally stimulating day, discussing and learning about the latest technical developments in my chosen field. The course was in a very chi chi hotel in Big London so this morning found me Paddington bound on the 6.30am train. I legged it to the venue dragging my massive handbag (WHEN will I learn how to travel light) and plonked myself down just in time. 8 hours later and it’s the return trip.
Now, on the one hand, the day was brilliant because it was so interesting but on the other? Meh. I got a view of what I don’t do any more. I don’t join in the cut and intellectual thrust as much, I don’t have the drive to develop new technical approaches and businesses, I don’t have the tenacity to stay on the ball. And I don’t have the stamina. I’m whacked.
I observe this quite dispassionately though. It’s like I looked in on somebody else’s life for a bit. It’s not mine anymore, it’s a version of what was. Not the future.
And what is the future?
I have no real plan apart from my old mantra of Choose Life. Three hours on a train twice a day is no longer Life. That’s, on reflection, a good thing. I’m more fired up by the crafty mags I read on the way home. Why am I surprised?!?!!?
So, a mixed day. But different feelings can throw each other into relief. I’m closing a chapter today. I’ve left my commuter clothes behind (not literally, don’t worry!). My Stitchy self remains, however. Now, thats a real relief. Pass the embroidery floss…